Comic Book Bracket 2017- PART 1 (Introduction)

The Proposition: 

Given our usual failings when it comes to picking a winning bracket for March Madness, we thought we would have better luck using our knowledge of comic book characters and general nerdom to project out a bracket.  It's time again for our favorite thought experiment- what if we represented each team in the NCAA tourney as a comic book character, and then picked who would move on based on a matchup between those characters.  

The rules: 

The higher seed gets to pick the battlefield, and we decide who would win based on how we think the fight would go. We each reserved the right to veto any match where we didn’t agree with the outcome, but neither of us ever used that power.  It’s important to remember that it doesn’t matter if George Mason would lose to North Carolina 9 times out of 10; all that matters is that on March 19^th, 2006 George Mason was better.  It is the same with our bracket.

The Teams: 

EAST

·       Villanova Wildcats- Nova- Sam Alexander- Nova is Nova- duh.

·       Mount St. Mary’s Mountaineers- Mountain Man- The Mountain Man is a hillbilly given super strength by drinking irradiated creek water.

·       New Orleans Privateers- Gambit- Almost synonymous with the bayou is Remy Lebeau the thief with a heart of gold, don you t’ink chere?

·       Wisconsin Badgers- The Badger- There’s not a whole lot of selection when it comes to superheroes from Wisconsin or repping burrowing mammals, but this superhero does both.  Sure he’s got a bad case of DID, but he’s also an expert martial artist. 

·       Virginia Tech Hokies- The Tinkerer- The Tech aspect is emphasized here- the tinkerer is kind of a B-list villain, but he makes the tech can keeps the A-listers up and running, and with a little tinkerer tech, even your ordinary thug can go toe-to-toe with someone like Spiderman.

·       Virginia Cavaliers- Cavalier-  Mortimer Drake- On account of he’s a Cavalier…

·       UNC Wilmington Seahawks- Hawk- of Hawk and Dove

·       Florida Gators- Killer Croc- I know he’s not a Gator, but close enough. 

·       East Tennessee State Buccaneers- Psycho Pirate- Pirate, Buccaneer? Close enough, and with Pyscho Pirate’s emotion warping powers, he’s not someone I’d want to face.

·       Southern Methodist University Mustangs- Jonah Hex- Probably the most famous of the DC Comics’ western characters- he can often be found astride a mustang.

·       Providence Friars- Longshot- I’m playing off the other meaning of providence as in chance, fate, luck- and in that regards- Longshot is a perfect fit plus I just love him as a character, and really want him to be in our version of Secret Wars.

·       University of Southern California Trojans- Ajax- This Deadpool antagonist shares his name with the eponymous Greek hero of the Trojan War.

·       Baylor Bears- Ursa Major- Because of the Bear theme

·       New Mexico State Aggies- Poison Ivy- Aggies is short for Agricultural, and no one does agriculture like Pamela Isley.

·       South Carolina Gamecocks- Robin (Jason Todd)- Both Robin and a gamecock are birds trained for fighting- Especially Jason who was easily the most violent of the Robins

·       Marquette Golden Eagles- Hawkgirl- Sure she’s more of a golden Hawk, but still….

·       Duke Blue Devils- Nightcrawler- On account of how he looks like a blue devil.

·       Troy Tojans- Wonder Girl (Donna Troy)- Her name is Troy- it fits.

MIDWEST

·       Kansas Jayhawks- The Flash (Jay Garrick)- Returning from last year with an emphasis on the Jay- is the OG Flash helmet and all.

·       North Carolina Central Eagles- Falcon (Sam Wilson)- Due to the dearth of Eagle characters, we’re saying that the falcon is close enough.

·       UC Davis Aggies- The Ringer (Anthony Davis)- A minor supervillain who used various rings out of a self-engineered battle suit. He gets this slot because he is Davis.

·       Miami Hurricanes- Weather Wizard- Weather Wizard controls the weather, and as such, things like hurricanes. 

·       Michigan State Spartans- Master Chief (Halo)- The best of the best of the best, the Master Chief is the one Spartan who can save the galaxy (but not on legendary).  There are comics of the game too- so his selection isn’t cheating.

·       Iowa State Cyclones- Red Tornado- a perfect fit

·       Nevada Wolf Pack- Multiple Man- One of the few people who is a pack unto himself

·       Purdue Boilermakers- Iron (Metal Men)- The strongest of the robot group the Metal Men, Iron is a fit for the boilermakers which is basically a locomotive.

·       Vermont Catamounts-Pumyra- Pumyra from the Thundercats is based on a Puma- which is essentially what a Catamount is.

·       Creighton Blue Jays- Blue Jay (DC)- Basically DC’s Yellowjacket, he can shrink down and fly like a blue jay.

·       Rhode Island Rams- War Machine (James Rhodes)- The Rams mascot is literally Rhodey the Ram- no better person to rep the Rhodes than Rhodey himself.

·       Oregon Ducks- Darkwing Duck- He is the shadow that lurks in the night…

·       Iona Gaels- Silver Banshee (Siobhan McDougal)- She comes from an old Gaelic clan between Scotland and Ireland.

·       Michigan Wolverines- Wolverine- because duh…

·       Oklahoma State Cowboys- Vigilante- A standard Cowboy-type character.

·       Louisville Cardinals- Red Robin (Tim Drake)- Another red bird Red Robin is the mantle Drake takes up after passing the Robin mantle down to Damian. 

·       Jacksonville State Gamecocks- Cluemaster (Arthur Brown) A Batman villain with a penchant for playing games and leaving clues.  His selection is playing up the game angle here.

WEST

·       Gonzaga Bulldogs – Lockjaw.  The top dog of the Marvel universe is also the top dog of the WEST. Teleportation, super-canine strength (but only in his jaw? I’m a little unclear on that) and the ability to psionically “scent” across all dimensions?  Those abilities combine with home court advantage to give us our first heavy favorite.

·       South Dakota State Jack Rabbits – White Rabbit (Jaina Hudson).  The Batman villainess who can split herself into two personas and can never be caught.

·       Northwestern Wildcats – Wildcat. Wildcat has a punchers chance, and an 8 seed can’t ask for anything better than that.

·       Vanderbilt Commodores – Commodore Norrington (Pirates of the Carribean).  There aren’t many shipping or boat related hero’s or villains.  I considered The Super-Sailor (one in a long line of Captain America knock offs that went evil) as well as the Spider-Boat or BatBoat, but Norrington is no slouch, with multiple frigates at his control he’s not someone you’d like to face if you had a Galleon or a Trireme…

·       Notre Dame Fighting  Irish – Daredevil (Matt Murdoch)  With his red color scheme, “Irish” may not be the first thing you think when you see Daredevil but if you look closer you’ll see that there is really no better option for the “Fighting Irish.”  He pummels people into submission with bare fists and a pair of sticks and then he goes and sits in a Catholic Church and feels bad about it.

·       Princeton Tigers – White Tiger.  Ava is a good fit for Princeton.  Smart and strong, she’s also a clear underdog given the average power level of this field.  She’s a scrapper though, and if underestimated could provide a real shock.

·       West Virginia Mountaineers – Sabertooth.  Sabertooth fits West Virginia like a glove.  He lives in the mountains, he’s ugly, he’s strong, he has too much hair and he’s undeservedly cocky.    

·       Bucknell Bison – Bison. One of the few shoe-ins.  To make it even better, after a little more reading on Bison, he was originally Billy Kitson who was a basketball star who lost his scholarship when he broke his leg.

·       Maryland Terrapins – Raphael (TMNT).  Raph is the wildest of the Ninja Turtles.  And seems like a good fit for Maryland this year.  They still have Melo Trimble and have a good record, but they aren’t consistent.

·        Xavier Musketeer/Blue Blobs – The Blob –The Blob was one of the most underrated villains.  The man is a beast, but he always gets ganged up on and made to look foolish.

·       Florida State Seminoles – Warpath.  He’s technically Apache, but he dated Risque who was a Seminole, and he’s much cooler than her so he’s in.

·       FGCU Eagles – American Eagle.  There are too many Eagle characters in this year’s tourney.

·       St. Mary’s Gaels – Peter Parquagh.  Weaker than his Earth-616 counterpart, Peter was raiser by his Scottish Aunt and Uncle after the death of his parents.

·       VCU Rams – Aries (Marvel).  The classic example of a villain who looks better than he is.  But he has a pair of ram horns which apparently hurt if he pokes you with them.

·       Arizona Wildcats – Shadowcat.  It’s too bad a school like Arizona gets a character as cool as Shadowcat, but she deserves at least a two seed, and they share the cat aspect.

·       North Dakota Fighting Hawks- Hawk Man- The have a new nickname, and a strong hero to represent them.

SOUTH

·       North Carolina Tar Heels – Clayface.  I’m going back to the classic.  I bet Clayface has some Tar on his heel.  I think Clayface is an underrated villain and North Carolina is an underrated  #1 seed. 

·       Texas Southern Tigers – Tigress (Artemis Crock). A slam dunk proposition.  Many women have worn the mantle of Tigress in the DC universe, but my favorite Tigress is Artemis after Kaldur “kills” her and she’s undercover with the baddies.

·       Arkansas Razorbacks – Bebop.  A mutant warthog with a Mohawk?  Sounds like Arkansas to me.

·       Seton Hall Pirates – Corsair.  The smoothest man in the galaxy this side of Lando Calrissian, Corsair is a space pirate and leader of the Starjammers, doesn’t get much better than that.

·       Minnesota Golden Gophers – Squirrel Girl.  There is a serious dearth of rodent themed super heroes.  But Squirrel Girl is one of the best fits in this bracket.  Once nothing more than a joke, she has suddenly become popular and her power level has increased according to her popularity.  Now she’s defeating Dr. Doom and Thanos and everyone loves it, but deep down, we all know it’s just a fantasy and she’s just a girl with a tail.

·       Middle Tennessee State Lightning – Superhero Static Shock! While Black Vulvan and Black Lightning and Lightning and Soul Power and Thunderfall, and Shango the Thunderer and Volt are all technically lightning themed heroes, the fact of the matter is, there is only one lightning themed hero for our generation.  Superhero Static Shock! (also, why is every lighting/electricity themed hero (even Storm) black?  Are black people especially conductive? I have so much to learn.

·       Butler Bulldogs – Alfred Pennyworth.  Batman has unlimited wealth, an astounding intellect, years and years of training, Superman as a best friend and yet, his greatest advantage over the rest of humanity is the unwavering support of Alfred.  Without him, Batman would be nothing.

·       Winthrop Eagles – Nighthawk.  Continuing our inclusion of Hawks as Eagles, Nighthawk is your classic villain, a little super serum mixed with training in martial arts and out comes a villain.

·       Cincinatti Bear Cats – Black Cat.  I’ve heard people claim that a Bearcat is actually a Red Panda or a Biterong or a Wovlerine, but the truth is, they have no idea.  Cinci’s color scheme and the cat naming lead to a selection of Black Cat.

·       Wake Forest Demon Deacons – Deacon.  A mountain of a man who believes he is doing the work of God by killing sinners.  I need to read more Ghost Rider comics, he sounds awesome.

·       Kansas State Wildcats – Catwoman.  Cats and Eagles man.  Cats and Eagles. 

·       UCLA Bruins – Zap Panda.  I’m digging deep here.  From Earth-C-Minus.  Zap Panda is the magician Zatanna if she was a panda.  There’s no need to think deeper than that.

·       Kent State Golden Eagles – Marahute (The Golden Eagle from the Rescuers Down Under)

·       Dayton Fliers – Angel.  Once again, before Apocalypse showed up he was just a guy who flew around without a shirt.

·       Wichita State Shockers – Shocker.  Shocker may have started off as a standard criminal, but as one of the few villains to have a winning record against Spiderman, it’s pretty clear Shocker is one bad dude, and you’d be a fool to overlook him.

·       Kentucky Wildcats – Dr. Manhattan.  Dr. Manhattan is immeasurably powerful, but he’s a bit of a risk because you just never know if he’ll show up or not.

·       Northern Kentucky Norse – Thor.  A massive 2 Seed verse 15 seed.  The Norseman of Norsemen. 

Top 10 Animated Shows of All Time

Winter is in full force, and that means less time outside braving the elements, and more time catching up on some of our favorite shows.  But what shows should we be catching up on?  Here at the Fastball Special, we took the time to put our heads together and determine what the absolute best animated shows of all time are.  The rules for this were simple- the show had to be animated (not necessarily anime), and we were judging primarily based on the quality of the show.  

“Since it is so likely that (children) will meet cruel enemies, let them at least have heard of brave knights and heroic courage. Otherwise you are making their destiny not brighter but darker.” – C.S. Lewis 

1. Batman: The Animated Series: The definitive take on Batman for our generation, BTAS is a cornerstone of the cartoon world.  It’s a sign of just how strong BTAS is, that 20+ years later the current DCU is still struggling under the expectations created by a kids’ TV show.  Not only did BTAS feature the best Batman and the best Joker (especially impressive for a cartoon) but they also saved a number of villains (here’s to you Mr. Freeze) and they even created Harley Quinn just for the show and she is now a crucial part of DC’s comic, TV, and movie universes.  It's an absolute classic- so much so that Batman's voice to me will always be Kevin Conroy.
2. Phineas and Ferb: This is the reigning Champion for best children’s TV show that is also funny for adults.  The key to such a high ranking is that it doesn’t stoop to the levels of most shows that also try to attract an adult audience.  Unlike late 90’s and early 00’s Nickelodeon they didn’t think they were edgy for including jokes about sex and drugs that are designed to go over kids heads.  They didn’t go negative, or “dark.”  Phineas and Ferb was overwhelmingly positive, overwhelmingly clean, and absolutely hilarious. They did this by creating simplistic running jokes and then twisting and playing with them throughout the series which kept it from getting stale. It doesn’t have the bingeability of some other shows, but if you’ve only got 20 mins, this is a go-to.
3. Naruto (Shippuden): At its peak it never reached the highs of even some of the shows below it on this list, but it ran FOREVER- over 600 episodes and counting- and it’s still bringing plotlines and battles that keep you watching “just one more” 7 or 8 times in a row.  The number one gutsy ninja brings it every episode as it establishes a HUGE world of characters that you really care for.
4. Avatar: The Last Airbender: Capitalizing on the success of Pokémon in the west and the growing popularity of anime, Avatar: The Last Air Bender is a show made in California in the style of Japanese animation.  The beauty of Air Bender is how tight the writing is.  Unlike the anime that spawned it, Air Bender knows exactly where it is going and tells a complete story in three 20 episode “books.”  Avatar completely develops all of its main characters and is very self aware of the tropes it relies on.
5. Star Wars: The Clone Wars: While Clone Wars may not reach the highs of some other shows on this list, the fact that it was the first successful TV foray into the world of Star Wars carries a ton of weight.  Clone Wars does more to develop the prequel characters than any of the movies.  And perhaps most impressively, it makes Anakin Skywalker likeable while showing his slow progression to the dark side.  In particular The Clone Wars shows the fall of the Jedi and shows how Darth Sidious used the War to corrupt and undermine the Jedi council.  Before The Clone Wars, Anakin’s “From my point of view the Jedi are evil!” in Revenge of the Sith makes absolutely no sense coming from a man that just killed 200 children, but with the Clone Wars you can see how he came to that point.  And it does it all while being a kids show that tells a good, unique story each episode and doesn’t require you to have watch the whole series in order. 
6. Yu Yu Hakesho: It’s fast moving, and the characters set it apart.  Yuske, Hiei, Kurama, Kurabara- are all awesome.  As Yuske takes on incrementally stronger spirits/demons, it just sucks you in.  The tournament sequences were always a favorite, and the Toguro arc- wow!  What it lacks in originality of plotlines, it more than makes up for in heart, awesome training montages, and lovable characters.  
7. Sword Art Online: Season 1 of this show might be top to bottom the best show ever.  This is the Sandy Koufax of the list.  In its prime, it’s untouchable- perfect.  The fastest moving of all the anime on here, this show gets to the point, as it explores one of the coolest of all premises.  Still, it went out in a blaze of glory- subsequent seasons weren’t nearly as good, and it just didn’t have the longevity that the other shows had.
8. Dragon Ball (Z): Dragon Ball is AMAZING!  Watching Goku grow up into the most recognizable anime character of all time was so much fun.  Once again the highlights are really the world martial arts tournaments, but it’s the investment in Goku as Earth’s champion fighting any who would threaten it that gets you to buy in.  The only downside to Dragon Ball and it’s slightly worse, but more famous Dragon Ball Z counterpart is how slow moving it is.  With attacks taking whole episodes to “charge”, it has to take a back seat to others, but it’s still season upon season of highly entertaining fighting action. 
9. He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: Massively underrated.  Although it only had a short run, the writers made me truly care about the characters in a show that was designed solely to sell muscle-y action figures.  And it did this while still delivering the spectacle you expect with a name like He-Man and a show all about how a normal dude gets a cool sword which gives him muscles and lets him ride a Tiger to fight an evil Skeleton King. While He-Man will never win any awards it was a very fun show to watch.
10. Pokemon: The Indigo League: The west’s gateway to anime.  This past year's love of Pokémon Go is only a taste of Pokémon’s power.  The fact that Pikachu is still the most beloved monster in the Pokémon universe through its hundreds of iterations (26 main games, card games, Pokémon Snap, Pokémon Go, ect…) is a testament to how pervasive the Pokémon Anime is.  Despite the fact that Ash and Pikachu are still going strong in the anime, every other series is just trying to capture the magic of that first run-when we were learning about the beauty and power of Pokémon right alongside Ash.

Honorable Mentions: Spider-Man, My Little Pony: The Magic of Friendship, Bleach, The Fairly Oddparents, X-Men, X-Men Evolution, One-Piece, The Simpsons

Top 5 Comic Writers

I've been on a roll lately devouring as many back issues of trades as I can from my local library.  This has led me to start to think through the question of what are the best comic book writers of all time.  As with anything, this is a very subjective exercise, but I highly recommend checking out anything you can find from these guys (and gals- not forgetting about you Gail Simone)

Honorable Mentions- Joss Whedon- His run on Astonishing X-Men was tremendous, Gail Simone- I liked her Birds of Prey stuff and I'm looking to find some of her Wonder Woman run collected somewhere, Geoff Johns-His DC Rebirth might be my favorite single issue ever, Greg Rucka- I weirdly loved his OMAC stuff leading up to Infinite Crisis, Brian Michael Bendis- I just read some of his Daredevil stuff, and I thought I was reading Frank Miller- which is high praise.

5. Jeph Loeb- Daredevil- Yellow, Batman- Long Halloween- Two spectacular books in a shorter career that was filled with spectacular books.  I'm always on the lookout for more of his stuff, since I liked these so much.  Hush is next on my reading list

4. Marv Wolfman- Crisis on Infinite Earths, New Teen Titans- A pioneer, Crisis on Infinite Earths may have had the highest degree of difficulty of any book, and he acquitted himself admirably. It had some flaws in my mind (not enough Batman and too much Superman), but it's a seminal work.

3. Stan Lee- Guy was a pioneer.  Sure Kirby probably deserves more credit than he gets, but without Stan, you're missing a big chunk of the Marvel universe.  In reading a lot of those old issues, some of it is comically dated, especially his treatment of women in comics, but it's dramatic, and above all exciting.  Without Stan, I'm probably not making this list right now.

2. Frank Miller- Comparing Frank Miller's Daredevil run to Stan Lee is like comparing Christian Bale's Batman to Adam West's- Both great, but SO different.  Miller took that character and reinvented it in ways that were awesome to read.  Born Again is an AMAZING book.  But then you also have Dark Knight Returns, which basically paved the way for Christian Bale's Batman.

1. Alan Moore- Watchmen- if he did nothing else, that's enough.  It is the most perfect graphic novel of all time, and I could not love it more.  Throw in the Killing Joke, League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, and Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow (my favorite Superman story), and you have the clear undisputed number 1.

Nerdom Power Rankings

What group is able to call themselves king of the nerds?

Here at the Fastball Special, we were debating levels and types of nerd-dom.  Combined we discovered that we're basically one 20 sided dice and some homemade Konoha headbands from becoming Pokemon masters of Nerd-dom: having collected all the varieties.  This naturally led to a heated debate to the age old question: what type of nerd is best?  We figured that we're uniquely qualified to take it upon ourselves to sort through all of the different types of nerd-dom, and to crown the best type of nerd- once and for all.

The groundrules: The best nerd has to be separate from mainstream, but not completely socially isolated.  It also should involve an aura of intellectual superiority over the masses.  This is our ranking of how we view people who would refer to themselves as “nerds.” It’s not about how the outside world views us, or how they view themselves.

We're going to start from the bottom.  Things that, while certainly in the realm of nerd-dom, are a little more main stream and we’ll work our way up, each adding to the list until we are left with the ultimate nerd-dom at the top.

Nerd-Lite

14. Juv Fantasy (Harry Potter/Twilight/Hunger Games/Maze Runner/Divergent)

• Like I said earlier, I consider these to be gateway nerd-dom.  Similar to candy cigarettes, their job is to get people in the door by being accessible, and by allowing you to see how acting like a nerd makes you feel.  Ultimately though, even though there are thousands of teen girls who think they are super nerds for wearing a scarlet and gold scarf, I’m not impressed, and I’m quite confident I could crush you in Harry Potter trivia without having to look up from the game of Magic: The Gathering I’m playing.

13. Comics TV/Movies (Marvel/DC)

• I waffled for a while on this one, I think the gap between 14 and 13 is pretty significant in this list.  However, the ubiquitous nature of comic book movies these days made it hard for me to push it any higher.  In the current world, I view comic book movies as a prerequisite for nerd-dom.  I love comic book movies, enough that even the “bad” comic book movies (Green Lantern, Superman Returns, etc) are movies I own and have watched multiple times, but the fact of the matter is, as I look down our list, I think every category of nerd that is left, will also be up on their comic book movies.

12.  Fantasy TV/Movies (LOTR/ Harry Potter/GOT)

• I feel like I’m being especially hard on the things that I love, but again, I think Fantasy TV and Movies are hurt a little bit by their own popularity.  While many people who watch GOT and LOTR and HP would refer to themselves as nerds, there are still a large number of people (possibly over 50%?) who have watched every movie and episode of all three and still wouldn’t consider themselves nerds.

11. Classic Gaming (Chess/Arcade/Cards)

o   Although less mainstream than others on this list, the fandom, by and large, isn’t as passionate.  Much of the classic gaming crowd straddles the border between hobbyists and nerds, and with that level of devotion, it’s hard to place them much higher on this list.

Basement Nerds
10. MMORPG (Warcraft/Starcraft/League of Legends)

o   The complete opposite end of the spectrum.  These fan bases are among the most passionate on the list.  Lives have LITERALLY been lost in devotion to these games.  This group conjures the image of the slightly overweight late-20s male playing online in lieu of a job in his parent's basement.  Admirable dedication to the guild, but perhaps a bit too extreme for real consideration for top nerd.

9. Live RPG (Dungeons & Dragons/LARP)

o   These nerds clearly have dedication to their craft even over many categories higher up on this list- which puts them in the top 10.  Admirable passion, and meeting together provides an in person level of social behavior that MMORPGs can’t replicate.  Still, all the dedication spent to play-acting fantasy worlds, tends towards more awkward interactions in the real world.  Society has come a long way on embracing nerdom, but this category still has something of an awkward reputation attached.

 Nerd is the Word
8. Art (Comic Covers/Art/Music/fan-fiction)

o   Similar to classic gaming, Art is broad category that covers a number of areas, but has a less passionate fan base that also crosses over with non-nerds.  Despite that, art gets this high because of the level of dedication and because it creates.  It’s one thing to watch or read or play something someone else made, it’s another category entirely to devote your time to creating nerdy items yourself.

7. Sci-Fi TV/Movies (Star Wars/Star Trek/Firefly)

o   And with that, we have moved into the Heart of Nerd-dom on Earth.   If I was on family feud and Steve Harvey asked me what nerds like, I would expect Star Wars/Trek to be the top answer with 94 points.  And they would list it that way, because Family Feud is old and out of touch and still thinks nerds are lame.

6.  Anime (Naruto/One Piece/Bleach/Kenshin)

o   I really wanted to put this one higher, but I don’t think Anime has gotten as much of a bump from the “Nerds are cool” crowd as the rest of nerdom has.  That being said, Anime is an entire category to itself, and in terms of output and followers, it is massive.  It has its own controversies and debates (Sub vs Dub) and its own art and movies and literature.  It truly is a behemoth.

5. Cosplay (Conventions/ Costumes)

o   The convention crowd, especially with the emphasis on costumes may have seemed weird several years ago, but it’s not as far out as it used to be.  These nerds pull elements from all throughout all of these groups, and are dedicated enough to plan vacations to dress up in character in the hopes of meeting their favorite characters.  Your comic-con nerd is oh-so-very close to the pinnacle of nerd-dom.  The only thing separating it from the top is a still lingering sentiment from years past that adults dressing up like its Halloween in July is somehow odd.  That and this.

Nerd Rushmore
4. Technology/ Engineering (computers/ gadgets/ RadioShack)

o   As much of Nerd culture becomes more mainstream, this category of nerd is becoming less.  20-30 years ago, this category likely reigned supreme as the pinnacle of nerdery.  Classic movies like ‘Revenge of the Nerds’ glorify the geeky computer type.  Even today, ‘Big Bang Theory’ ties the STEM subjects right into other, more modern aspects of comic/fantasy/sci-fi nerdom.  Glasses and suspenders, ala Urkle are still associated with what it means to be a nerd, but this element is definitely post-peak.  This category has the feeling of intellectual superiority over the masses, but it’s fallen off a bit from when being a nerd meant you probably built a computer from component parts in your garage.

3. Fantasy Literature (LOTR/Wheel of Time/GOT)

o   I’m a little surprised Fantasy Literature made it this high with how mainstream it has become.  Thanks to Game of Thrones and the Juv Lit books, sitting down in class with an 800 page book with a dragon on the cover doesn’t have quite the same stigma it used to have. When you really dig into it though, it’s pretty simple.  In the same way that we both rate speedsters as more powerful than people give them credit for, we also highly value reading.  Reading takes more effort, it takes a level of dedication that eliminates casual fans and, perhaps most importantly, it goes deeper.  When I made my screen name Ecthelion113 back in high school a few people quoted Boromir’s lines about the White Tower of Ecthelion gleaming in the morning sun to me.  And that was nice.  It showed they had watched and remembered the movies.  But when someone asked me if I liked the Unfinished Tales version of Ecthelion, Lord of the Fountain, Warden of 7^th gate (who was the namesake of the steward who was the namesake of the tower that Boromir mentions) and his battle with Gothmog, Lord of Balrogs or if I like the version published in the Simarilion, then I knew I was talking to a real fan.  

2.  Sci-Fi Lit (Star Wars/Star Trek/Asimov/Verne/Herbert)

o   Very similar to fantasy literature in that appreciating the literature takes more time, and dedication than watching (even admittedly long) movies.  The argument for sci-fi literature is that in addition to being amazing, it remains a little less mainstream than its fantasy counterpart.  All the literature groups look down on their dumbed- down movie counterparts, maintaining that the books were better.  But those in the sci- fi crowd have the additional comfort of knowing that their source material remains a little more obscure, and tends not to make best-seller lists or Oprah.  What’s great about sci-fi literature is that at its core it isn’t sci-fi.  Real sci-fi fans understand that great sci-fi is just human stories in fantastic settings.  A lot of people don’t get past the laser guns and spaceships to unwrap the wonders within, while those within hold the wonderful secret that even stories about robots often just ultimately reveal what it’s like to be human.  If someone knows the 3 laws of robotics, has a good understanding of psychohistory, and can discuss the real forces behind the political environment of Arrakis, you know that person is a first-class nerd.  Still, one category of nerd surpasses even this.

King of the Nerd-dom
1.  Comic Book Literature (Comics)

o   Which leaves us with Comic Book Literature, the undisputed heavy weight champion of the Nerd World.  Comics combine a VAST amount of source material, a nearly impossible maze of retcons and character evolutions, legendary writers, artists, inkers, with material that can make you laugh, cry, or anywhere in between.  Comics are fantastic and otherworldly, while reflecting what's deepest in the human heart.  Comic nerds understand all of that, all while  mentioning (off hand) that while Superman’s given date of birth is February 29^th (the day his ship landed) and Clark Kent’s is listed as June 18^th, on the Kryptonian calendar, Kal-El was actually born on the 35^th of Eorx in the year 9998.  When you run into one of these nerds you should stop talking and just learn at the feet of nerd royalty.   Now even within Comic book literature there are a few categories. Those who have read every comic book known to man over those who have just read certain comic books and those who have just read certain comic books over those who have gained most of their knowledge from Wikipedia pages.  But regardless of how the knowledge was gained, a deep understanding of comic literature is essential if you want to reach the top rung of Nerdom.   

West(brook) Side Story

Cain Marko: This is NBA Jam style heat.  Where you’re sure it’s going in as soon as you inbound the ball and just jack it up: http://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2016/5/30/11816136/leandro-barbosa-stephen-curry-warriors-thunder?yptr=yahoo.

Also, it looks like you were correct about Westbrook.  He may just end up never winning the big one.  Although, it really looked like he was going to make you look foolish for a few days there.

Walter Kovacs: I have a confession: I was wrong.

Flashback to last Monday, you and I were discussing the finals, and I gave you my hot take- that Russell Westbrook and the Thunder will never win a title as currently constructed.  My premise was that what Westbrook brings to the table: scoring, confidence, speed set to Ludicrous- is also what keeps his team from winning: selfishness, irrational confidence, and out of control play.  I believe I compared him to a Greek tragic hero- that what makes him great is also his fatal flaw.  OKC then proceeded to make me look like an idiot by going up 3 games to 1 on what might be one of the best teams in NBA history. 

And even though the Thunder ultimately faltered, I don’t think I was right.  Sure Westbrook has limitations, but it wasn’t those limitations that cost them the series.  I don’t think it was anything that the Thunder did- they played great.  I think they ended up playing the role of the mid 90’s Utah Jazz.  Stockton and Malone are all-time greats, but they never won the big one.  They had limitations, but it wasn’t their inherent limitations that put a championship out of reach, it was Michael freakin’ Jordan.  They way Steph and Klay shot in games 6 and 7, I don’t know that any team could have done better than what the Thunder did.  Westbrook didn’t win, but I don’t think that makes me right.  In a year where they get a few breaks, or don’t go up against 2 of the best shooters in history, what Westbrook brings is enough for a ring.  This just wasn’t that year.

CM: Wow.  A stunning turn of events.  

But I think you’re probably right. People are talking about how the Thunder choked this series away, but, at the end of the regular season, if you had told me that the Thunder would beat the Spurs and take the Warriors to game 7, I would have said it was a phenomenal job by Westbrook and Durant.  The Warriors are the defending champs, and just finished the best regular season in NBA history.  They have a the 2 time defending MVP, including the first unanimous MVP.  Blaming the Thunder for losing in 7, is like blaming my 3 year old niece for losing to me in basketball this weekend up at the cabin. 

WK: Ultimately, there are a lot of legacy questions for great players that will be decided in the next few years.  Westbrook and Durant may be this generation’s Stockton and Malone, unless they can win a title- together or separately depending on how free agency shakes out.  Lebron only has the 2 titles from his Miami years, and his title window is closer to the end than the beginning.  If he finishes with just 2, wouldn’t that be considered a huge disappointment given his talents?  Is Steph starting a dynasty or is it lightning in a bottle?  If Golden State repeats, and stays together, a lot of great players may not get rings.  If Golden State loses, Lebron’s legacy gets A LOT stronger.  Throw in free agency, a rising salary cap that gives everybody tons of money to throw at guys, and the trend towards superstar team-ups straight out of a Marvel cross-over event, and the next few years could be really interesting in the NBA- starting right now.  I for one am looking forward to how it all plays out.

MCU Chess Set

Here at the Fastball Special, we have a little bit of a weird obsession with the game of chess.  We're not particularly talented, but it's a very sophisticated game that elevates one's own level of sophistication just by participating.  In honor of Captain America: Civil War, we went through the thought process of designing our own Marvel Cinematic Universe Chess set.  Here's our rationale- now if only we could get our hands on a 3D printer to make this happen...

Heroes

Hero Pawn: James Buchannan “Bucky” Barnes- There were a lot of good pawn nominations, but Bucky is my favorite.  He’s THE key member of Cap’s original team, but is ultimately sacrificed in pursuit of the bigger goal.  In addition, like a pawn, he is able to potentially be reincarnated as a much more powerful piece. 

Hero Rook: Thor- He’s a straight ahead sort of guy.  It’s why Loki tricks him so easily.  He’s very strong, and is definitely one of the MCU’s biggest boppers, but he’s a little limited in his thinking.

Hero Knight: Ant-Man- He’s not the most powerful hero, but he’s also very difficult to get boxed in.  He’s only got one real move, and he relies heavily on attacking from unexpected angles.  Also, you could totally see him as a piece riding one of his pet ants like a horse.

Hero Bishop: Iron Man- Mostly because you can’t have an MCU chess set without him.  His superior intelligence and moderate power align him most closely with the Bishop.  Bishops are great for taking out large numbers of inferior pieces in succession, but often require help to take down the big guys.

Hero Queen: The Hulk-  He’s incredibly powerful, can attack all over, and there isn’t a single Hero or Villain that can take him one on one.  But, bringing him out early is incredibly risky.  Ideally, you keep him back as Banner until a key moment in the fight.

Hero King: Captain America – I may be biased given the recent release of the film.  Cap isn’t the most powerful, but he is the heart and soul of the MCU.  He’s versatile and dangerous in his own right, but ultimately, Cap falls, the heroes fall.

Villains

Villain Pawn: Obadiah Stane “Iron Monger”- Of all the MCU’s villains, the iron monger is probably the weakest.  And when Stane attacks, it comes sideways, not straight ahead.

Villain Rook: Ronan the Accuser- Ronan is one of the most powerful villains any of our heroes have come up against. He can trade punches with anyone, but he's not very devious. He sets his eyes on a goal and powers through to it. 

Villain Knight: Loki- The perfect counter to Thor’s Rook.  Loki isn’t as powerful, but he can’t get boxed in, he can move all over the board quickly, and he never attacks in a straight line.

Villain Bishop: Red Skull- Strong, but not overwhelmingly so.  He's smart and  doesn’t attack straight on.  Also, in the MCU he played his hand early, made an attack on the King (Cap) and was defeated. (which often happens in our games) but his death didn’t feel very final.  And I believe he is still out there waiting to strike again. (like the second bishop)

Villain Queen: Ultron- Incredibly powerful- especially in the technological world we live in, and very difficult to take down.  In addition, his special power is the same as the queen’s in chess- even things that might be originally considered pawns, can turn back into Ultron since he transfers his consciousness into anything technological so easily.

Villain King: Thanos- We know this guy is the big bad.  He’s out there, and the goal of the game is take him out.  There are other enemies, but if you can somehow stop Thanos- you win the MCU.  I briefly considered making him a piece that is a little more powerful, but ultimately, he hasn’t moved much in the MCU- the villains have been sending out lesser pieces- trying to get an advantage, while keeping him safe and out of reach- in the chess match of the MCU, Thanos’ involvement perfectly parallels the relative inactivity and supreme importance of the king.

May the 4th Be With Us

Walter Kovacs:  In honor of tomorrow’s national holiday (May the Fourth Be With You!) and NBA Playoffs, I propose a thought exercise. 

Recast the major characters from Star Wars using only players from the remaining Playoff teams.

Cain Marko:  I love it! This is so much tougher than I thought it’d be, though.   

I’ll start with one character from each era. 

Luke: Steph Curry.

People can love Leia and Han and Darth Vader and every other character all they want, ultimately Star Wars is Luke’s universe and they’re all just living in it.  The 2015-2016 NBA season is Steph’s and everyone knows it.  The similarities don’t stop there though.   If there is a bright center of the basketball universe, then Davidson is the campus that it’s farther from.  Curry made his name known at Davidson in the tournament, (Georgetown was his first Death Star) but everyone just kind of assumed it was luck, or a hot streak.  That it wouldn’t play with the big boys.  Then he joins the NBA, is good but not special, for a while. (Hoth era Skywalker)  But then he gets hurt, cries a little, rededicates himself to his craft, and he comes back, not just stronger than ever, but stronger than anyone has ever seen.   And now he has disappeared.  He’s barely been in the playoff and yet we’re still talking about him.  I’ve read more articles about when Curry is coming back, than I have words about the Heat/Raptors series.  He could come back for the last five minutes of the NBA Finals, stare meaningfully into Klay Thompson’s eyes after Klay just beat LeBron, and we’d still be talking about Curry.

Kylo Ren:  LeBron James. 

This may sound harsh because, as you well know, I have become a LeBron apologist in my old age, but I think it’s correct.  I struggled with where to put LeBron. He’s too important to the NBA to leave out, but I had a hard time nailing him down.  I considered Princess Leia (because to me, he’s royalty) I considered Darth Vader (for the Dark/Light comparison with Steph in the Finals) but ultimately the fractured nature of his personality fit in perfectly with Kylo.  Kylo is also royalty of a sort, as a Skywalker.  LeBron was known from a very young age, there was always pressure on him.  Early is his career he wanted to be the good guy, but then he turned his back on the Light.  He formed the Knights of Miami, betrayed Cleveland and embraced his dark side. Now he wants to come back to the light, but he’s finding people haven’t accepted him, because there are some things you just can’t come back from. (Like killing your own father)   I think it also fits because I like Kylo Ren the best when his mask is on, and he’s crushing people, and LeBron is no different. 

Jengo Fett: Damian Lillard. 

Lillard is someone I want to like.  He looks cool, he’s got a fun style of play, and he’s good looking.  But, no matter how badly I want to like him, he’s just not actually that good.  I don’t trust him to win a big series.  He is the best of the “normal” NBA players, but when the stars (Jedi) come to town, he’s going to be looking at an early exit, which is surprisingly unsurprising. Putting up points and looking good with the ball in your hands against the Spurs, is the NBA equivalent of having a flame thrower and a jet pack when fighting Mace Windu. 

WK: LOVE THESE!

I’m not nearly as well versed in Star Wars as you, but I took a stab at a few anyway.

Mace Windu: Kevin Durant. 

Mace has achieved the rank of Jedi Master- the elite of the elite, but there are have been some questions as to if he’s even the most powerful force user on his team!  Like Mace, we know Durant is a good guy- he’s never going over to the dark side.  This season, like the Star Wars saga, is all about the Skywalker family, and Mace is on the outside looking in.  Durant and Mace are both capable leaders with powerful skills, but they both are role players in someone else’s story, and ultimately, as powerful as they are, you know from the start that they’re not going to make all the way- to either a championship or to the original trilogy.

Princess Leia: Klay Thompson. 

If Luke is Steph, then his sibling is for sure Klay.  Like Leia, Klay has a similar if slightly underdeveloped skill set to his splash brother.  Even though, Leia isn’t a full Jedi, her force skills and sensitivity is Sky(walker)- high.  Leia royalty twice over in terms of the richness of her Jedi heritage the adopted daughter of an imperial senator- a legitimate princess.  Klay also comes from noble stock through his father’s line- the basketball equivalent of a prince.  Leia and Klay may not be the strongest in the Star Wars universe or in the NBA, but they are a perfect fit within their system, doing whatever it takes to get the rebellion a W.

CM: Nice work.  I waffled for a while on who to choose for Leia, but Klay as a Leia is a very good choice.

Now for the big one.

Darth Vader: Tim Duncan. 

Duncan has been the chosen one since day one. And we liked him, and we rooted for him.  He was squeaky clean and incredibly boring.  But then he teamed up with Pop (The Emperor) to form the First Galactic Empire.  Pop runs the Empire, but it is Duncan out there doing his dirty work. The change from good to evil came when Duncan didn’t age. (die) He had been left for dead, it was supposed to move on to the next generation.  Durant and LeBron.  But Pop wouldn’t let that happen.  Using the most advanced medical technology (rest) he brought Duncan back and now the two of them are dominating the NBA long after their time has passed.  Also, Duncan seems nice, but that’s only because he doesn’t say much, inside he’s as competitive as they come.  When I thought through everyone left in the play offs and decided, who might be willing to kill a room full of children to win the title, he’s the only one.  LeBron and Durant care too much about their image and their sneaker deals.  Curry has too many morals. If Kobe was still around, he’d be the obvious choice, but he died.  A while ago.

WK: This is the Best. Thing. Ever.  I literally just did a spit take of my water when I saw Darth Duncan!  I’d also like to nominate a few quick hits to close us out:

Stormtrooper: Kyle Lowry.

The whole playoffs- it’s like he forgot how to shoot.

Chewbacca: Steven Adams.

He’s tall. He’s furry.  Occasionally roars- if you’re playing a version of chess- best to let him win. 

Young Yoda: Russell Westbrook.

He’s a tiny, fearless little dude, able to flip and contort his body at will.  Only lacks the hundreds of years of Jedi patience and control.

Old Yoda: Dwayne Wade.

Also a fearless smaller player capable of amazing feats, but saves them up for when they’re really needed.  Wise, and capable- he’s been to the mountaintop, but ultimately it’s the next generation’s turn.

CM: I couldn’t agree more.  Let’s get more into depth with this during our annual Star Wars Day marathon.